The Examination
First Published 10/10/2015
This story is inspired by an embarrassing and somewhat painful medical procedure I had recently (I’m fine thanks, nothing to worry about). Liz is a very unfair caricature of a real nurse, Dr Ingram of a real doctor. The casual attitude to patients’ dignity and the patient’s feelings about it are real, as is what happens with the sheet. Medics sometimes forget that what is routine to them is anything but for their patients. They can’t be expected to examine what they can’t see but could use a little more sensitivity sometimes.
I haven’t written this to complain about my doctors, I have no complaints and it’s really my own irrational feelings to blame, but just to introduce the story.
Part One – The Letter
It was a Thursday afternoon when Jason Phillips got the letter. It was also his 24th birthday, which only served to make it worse.
He had been with the firm a few months, working in production control. A clerk from personnel walked around the office handing everyone a white envelope and making them sign a sheet to say they’d received it. There was a chorus of angry protest as people opened their letters.
“What the hell?”
“They must be joking!”
“This takes the Mickey!”
“This is a wind-up, right?”
“Dear Jason Phillips,” he read, after opening the letter, “There has recently been a case of a sexually transmitted disease being passed amongst employees. To protect the health of all our staff it is necessary that all employees undergo a sexual health check so that we can assess how far the problem has spread and refer the affected individuals for appropriate treatment.
“We apologise for the necessity of this and also the short notice, which is due to the urgency of the situation. I appreciate that this will not be popular with everyone and so I feel I should draw your attention to clause 14 of your contract which states that ‘all employees are required to co-operate with health and safety policy and agree to any health surveillance that may be deemed necessary for their own welfare or that of others.’ This simple check is mandatory for everyone; it does not imply any suspicion of wrongdoing.
“Please accept my assurance that this procedure is easy and painless and will be carried out by specialist health professionals who do not work for the company, or even live in the area. No-one else will be present unless you request it; you may bring a friend or family member if you wish. Anyone found to need treatment will be referred as appropriate; no records will be kept by the company about any specific diagnosis. I hope you will agree we have done our utmost to protect your privacy as far as possible.
“Everyone working in Production Control is to attend on Thursday 12th July 1984. To avoid disrupting production we have to do this after hours so please report to Hastert Building at 5 p.m. We apologise again for doing this at such short notice but we anticipate everyone will be finished by 7 p.m. and overtime will be paid. Thank you in advance for your co-operation in this matter.
“Yours sincerely,
“Julia Eastman (HR Director)”
“Is this for real?” Susan Gormley wanted to know. “It’s not one of your stupid wind-ups is it Mark?” she asked suspiciously. Someone found a letter from Julia Eastman about their holidays and compared the signature with that on the new letter. They were identical as far as anyone could tell.
“Well, they certainly picked a good day for it” commented Patrick Slater in his strong Ulster accent. “The Glorious Twelfth, anniversary of the Battle of the Boyne that helped make this a free country, and they do this to us. Today’s a bank holiday where I come from; if only it was here too.”
The general mood seemed to be one of grudging acceptance that this was inevitable. Everyone complained, nobody suggested refusing to co-operate, Patrick wondered aloud who had been spreading the clap around.
“Haven’t you heard?” asked Kay Osborne. She was always up to speed with the latest gossip. “It’s Mandy Davis; she always was the town bike. Apparently she picked up a dose in London and passed it on to two or three of the lads in the warehouse. All on the same day probably, knowing her. Now the bosses are panicking about it, hence the tests.”
“Where the hell is the Hastert Building anyway?” asked Jason. “I’ve never heard of it.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll show you where it is” said Mark Lawson, the oldest in the office at thirty. “We can all go together at five.”
“It’s not finding the place that I’m worried about” Jason commented.
“I know, but once they make up their minds about something like this they won’t back down and if you argue they’ll just think you’re a trouble maker and it won’t do any good anyway. Unless you’re going to quit over it you might as well just make the best of it.”
“Why does it have to be such short notice? I was going out tonight, now I’ll be late” complained Kay.
“Probably so’s you can’t ring in sick to try and get out of it” Mark guessed cynically and probably accurately. There was no way this could all have been organised and the letters written that day so management must have known about it the day before and kept quiet.
Various people started reaching for phones to tell their families they would be late. Jason called his mother. She always cooked a special meal for his birthday and he told her not to expect him before seven thirty, just in case. Luckily she had not yet started the preparations.
It seemed particularly unfair that this was happening on his birthday and he couldn’t even gripe about it to his colleagues because he had refused to tell them when his birthday was. He hated being the centre of attention anyway, and the people he worked with were a bit too fond of rough practical jokes. He was too old for ‘the bumps’ and it could get worse than that; he’d heard that for Mark’s 30th, a few months before he started, they’d booked a strippagram and Mark and the girl had both ended up naked in the office. The thought of anything like that chilled him.
It was hard to concentrate for the rest of the afternoon. He kept worrying about the exam. He imagined himself losing his temper and walking out. Emotionally that was what he wanted to do but reason warned against losing a good job.
The Examination by Britguy
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Britguy
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The Examination by Britguy Part Two
Part Two – The Examination
Eventually it was five o’clock and Mark led the seven of them (those already mentioned plus Linda Bellingham and Tracy Smith) out of a side door and across the car park to the empty unit next door. Inside the door a sign said ‘Silverman Occupational Health’ with a Birmingham phone number and an arrow pointing to the staircase.
“This is the Hastert Building” Mark explained. “It used to be Hastert Fashions before it closed down and we just still call it that. It’s empty now but the company borrow it or rent it or something whenever they need some extra space.”
They ascended the staircase. Jason was glad these people were from a city an hour away where he knew no-one. At the top of the stairs two middle aged nurses were waiting to collect their appointment letters (“to prove we’ve seen you”) and usher them into a room.
“Hello, everyone,” one of them began as they sat down, “I’m Maggie and this” – she pointed to the other nurse – “is Liz. We have two consulting rooms; girls on the left, boys on the right. We may as well do you in alphabetical order so if there are no questions we’ll get started.” She looked at her clipboard for a few moments. No-one spoke. “Okay then.... Bellingham, Linda, please.”
Linda stood up and the nurse escorted her through the left hand door in the far wall. The other nurse consulted her paperwork and barked “Lawson, Mark!” with no please and no smile. She seemed to be a bit of a ‘dragon’ to say the least. Mark followed her through the right hand door.
Ten minutes later he emerged, grinning self-consciously: “Could be worse” he announced.
“Phillips, Jason” barked the dragon. He was ushered into a room perhaps fifteen feet square that was almost completely unfurnished. There was a desk and chair against the wall just by the door that was being used for paperwork by the nurse. At the right hand end of the back wall an area three feet square had been carved out of the room with a door in one side, possibly to the next room. The rest of the back wall was almost entirely covered by a large mirror with a gurney placed just in front of it, a pillow at the end nearest the left of the room. A radio was playing a local pop music station.
“Sorry about the noise, I don’t like it either but we have to have it to make sure nothing said in here can be overheard. Get yourself ready and lie down please.” He lay on the gurney as instructed.
“No, not like that” said the dragon impatiently. “I need you to strip from the waist down and pull your shirt up well above the navel please.” Seeing the look on his face she added “This is a sexual health exam and we need to see the relevant area. Really Mr Phillips” she added witheringly “I can assure you any interest I have in your body is purely professional.”
She busied herself with some paperwork on a clipboard but made no attempt to leave, or even turn her back. He couldn’t believe it, did she really expect him to strip off in front of her and then just lie there, exposing himself to a woman he had never met before? Clearly she did, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. He stood there paralysed, knowing he couldn’t refuse, yet unable to force himself to comply.
Seeing his predicament she peeled back the paper sheet on the gurney. “You can get under that if you like” she suggested, and turned away to attend to something else. He gratefully took the opportunity to rapidly remove his shoes, socks, trousers and underwear, desperately hoping that she would not turn back around before he could get under the sheet. Luckily he succeeded.
The nurse looked around to see him lying under the sheet. “Doctor’s just finishing Mr Lawson’s write-up” she said. “I’ll just go and tell him you’re ready for him. She disappeared through the door in the back wall, leaving him alone.
Xxxxx
“Not long now” said a gloating Mark Lawson as the door shut behind Jason and the nurse. “This is going to be the best birthday wind-up ever! Try to keep quiet while we’re in there though, we don’t want him to twig it.”
“Is she really going to make him get his dick out?” asked Kay sceptically.
“You’ll see” replied Mark. He had taken a dislike to Jason from the start and his refusal to say when his birthday was irked Mark. He thought the refusal was rude and anti-social and the reasons for it wimpish and cowardly. His friend the personnel clerk was about to get her reward for checking the files for him. He meant to give Jason a day to remember and had not told his colleagues all the details lest they refuse to go along with it. Setting this up had taken time, effort and even some expense and he intended to make it worth his while. He would soon have some natural allies. He leaned out of the window and waved to them.
Footsteps could be heard climbing the stairs. The clerk from personnel came in, accompanied by her friend from accounts and two of the secretaries. They were followed by eight rough-looking middle aged women, almost all of the filter assembly section. These women were rough and intimidating and any young man who wanted to keep his trousers on gave their section a wide berth.
Susan realised that these were just about all of the women in the company who could be trusted to keep their mouths shut and started to get a bad feeling, knowing she’d helped to set this up and wondering exactly what ‘this’ was going to be. Mark had said Jason would “get his prick out” if they played along and pretended the letters were real but he’d been sketchy about the details and she hadn’t expected a big audience for it, just their section.
“I don’t know about this” began Susan apprehensively. “This is beginning to get out of hand. Are you sure you’re not going too far, Mark?”
Big Mo, charge-hand of the filter section and even more scary than the rest, rounded on her. “You keep your ....ing mouth SHUT my girl!” she said furiously. “I haven’t stopped on and missed my lift for you to ....ing ruin it. You open your ....ing mouth to spoil this and I’ll fill it with this!” She waved her fist. A real lady, thought Susan sarcastically, but she had little choice but to let events take their course.
Liz (the dragon) appeared in the left hand doorway and beckoned them through. They found themselves in a dimly lit corridor. Maggie and Linda were already in it, waiting for them. About twenty five feet down it they filed carefully through a door on the right which let them into an even more gloomy room about twenty feet by fifteen.
This room was completely empty. It was dark because all the window blinds were closed and the only light came from a large clear glass window in the right hand wall which gave a view into the next room. Jason lay on some kind of bed just inside the window, covered by a sheet. To the left of the window an area three feet square had been carved out of the room with a door in one side, possibly to the next room. A young man in a white coat stood by the door. A music centre quietly played a local radio station.
“Won’t he see us?” whispered Kay anxiously.
“Eventually, yes,” replied Mark in a low voice, “but not just yet. That’s a two-way mirror ; all he can see is himself. That’s why we have to keep it dark in here. You know how the windows in your house turn into mirrors if you don’t draw the curtains when it’s dark? This is the same principle.”
“This is really unfair” muttered Susan.
“I won’t tell you again” said Big Mo, speaking quietly for probably the first time in years.
“Ready then?” asked the young man. He and Liz walked through the door into the other room. “Hello, I’m Doctor Ingram” his voice came out of the speakers on the music centre, picked up by the same microphone that was relaying the radio.
Eventually it was five o’clock and Mark led the seven of them (those already mentioned plus Linda Bellingham and Tracy Smith) out of a side door and across the car park to the empty unit next door. Inside the door a sign said ‘Silverman Occupational Health’ with a Birmingham phone number and an arrow pointing to the staircase.
“This is the Hastert Building” Mark explained. “It used to be Hastert Fashions before it closed down and we just still call it that. It’s empty now but the company borrow it or rent it or something whenever they need some extra space.”
They ascended the staircase. Jason was glad these people were from a city an hour away where he knew no-one. At the top of the stairs two middle aged nurses were waiting to collect their appointment letters (“to prove we’ve seen you”) and usher them into a room.
“Hello, everyone,” one of them began as they sat down, “I’m Maggie and this” – she pointed to the other nurse – “is Liz. We have two consulting rooms; girls on the left, boys on the right. We may as well do you in alphabetical order so if there are no questions we’ll get started.” She looked at her clipboard for a few moments. No-one spoke. “Okay then.... Bellingham, Linda, please.”
Linda stood up and the nurse escorted her through the left hand door in the far wall. The other nurse consulted her paperwork and barked “Lawson, Mark!” with no please and no smile. She seemed to be a bit of a ‘dragon’ to say the least. Mark followed her through the right hand door.
Ten minutes later he emerged, grinning self-consciously: “Could be worse” he announced.
“Phillips, Jason” barked the dragon. He was ushered into a room perhaps fifteen feet square that was almost completely unfurnished. There was a desk and chair against the wall just by the door that was being used for paperwork by the nurse. At the right hand end of the back wall an area three feet square had been carved out of the room with a door in one side, possibly to the next room. The rest of the back wall was almost entirely covered by a large mirror with a gurney placed just in front of it, a pillow at the end nearest the left of the room. A radio was playing a local pop music station.
“Sorry about the noise, I don’t like it either but we have to have it to make sure nothing said in here can be overheard. Get yourself ready and lie down please.” He lay on the gurney as instructed.
“No, not like that” said the dragon impatiently. “I need you to strip from the waist down and pull your shirt up well above the navel please.” Seeing the look on his face she added “This is a sexual health exam and we need to see the relevant area. Really Mr Phillips” she added witheringly “I can assure you any interest I have in your body is purely professional.”
She busied herself with some paperwork on a clipboard but made no attempt to leave, or even turn her back. He couldn’t believe it, did she really expect him to strip off in front of her and then just lie there, exposing himself to a woman he had never met before? Clearly she did, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. He stood there paralysed, knowing he couldn’t refuse, yet unable to force himself to comply.
Seeing his predicament she peeled back the paper sheet on the gurney. “You can get under that if you like” she suggested, and turned away to attend to something else. He gratefully took the opportunity to rapidly remove his shoes, socks, trousers and underwear, desperately hoping that she would not turn back around before he could get under the sheet. Luckily he succeeded.
The nurse looked around to see him lying under the sheet. “Doctor’s just finishing Mr Lawson’s write-up” she said. “I’ll just go and tell him you’re ready for him. She disappeared through the door in the back wall, leaving him alone.
Xxxxx
“Not long now” said a gloating Mark Lawson as the door shut behind Jason and the nurse. “This is going to be the best birthday wind-up ever! Try to keep quiet while we’re in there though, we don’t want him to twig it.”
“Is she really going to make him get his dick out?” asked Kay sceptically.
“You’ll see” replied Mark. He had taken a dislike to Jason from the start and his refusal to say when his birthday was irked Mark. He thought the refusal was rude and anti-social and the reasons for it wimpish and cowardly. His friend the personnel clerk was about to get her reward for checking the files for him. He meant to give Jason a day to remember and had not told his colleagues all the details lest they refuse to go along with it. Setting this up had taken time, effort and even some expense and he intended to make it worth his while. He would soon have some natural allies. He leaned out of the window and waved to them.
Footsteps could be heard climbing the stairs. The clerk from personnel came in, accompanied by her friend from accounts and two of the secretaries. They were followed by eight rough-looking middle aged women, almost all of the filter assembly section. These women were rough and intimidating and any young man who wanted to keep his trousers on gave their section a wide berth.
Susan realised that these were just about all of the women in the company who could be trusted to keep their mouths shut and started to get a bad feeling, knowing she’d helped to set this up and wondering exactly what ‘this’ was going to be. Mark had said Jason would “get his prick out” if they played along and pretended the letters were real but he’d been sketchy about the details and she hadn’t expected a big audience for it, just their section.
“I don’t know about this” began Susan apprehensively. “This is beginning to get out of hand. Are you sure you’re not going too far, Mark?”
Big Mo, charge-hand of the filter section and even more scary than the rest, rounded on her. “You keep your ....ing mouth SHUT my girl!” she said furiously. “I haven’t stopped on and missed my lift for you to ....ing ruin it. You open your ....ing mouth to spoil this and I’ll fill it with this!” She waved her fist. A real lady, thought Susan sarcastically, but she had little choice but to let events take their course.
Liz (the dragon) appeared in the left hand doorway and beckoned them through. They found themselves in a dimly lit corridor. Maggie and Linda were already in it, waiting for them. About twenty five feet down it they filed carefully through a door on the right which let them into an even more gloomy room about twenty feet by fifteen.
This room was completely empty. It was dark because all the window blinds were closed and the only light came from a large clear glass window in the right hand wall which gave a view into the next room. Jason lay on some kind of bed just inside the window, covered by a sheet. To the left of the window an area three feet square had been carved out of the room with a door in one side, possibly to the next room. A young man in a white coat stood by the door. A music centre quietly played a local radio station.
“Won’t he see us?” whispered Kay anxiously.
“Eventually, yes,” replied Mark in a low voice, “but not just yet. That’s a two-way mirror ; all he can see is himself. That’s why we have to keep it dark in here. You know how the windows in your house turn into mirrors if you don’t draw the curtains when it’s dark? This is the same principle.”
“This is really unfair” muttered Susan.
“I won’t tell you again” said Big Mo, speaking quietly for probably the first time in years.
“Ready then?” asked the young man. He and Liz walked through the door into the other room. “Hello, I’m Doctor Ingram” his voice came out of the speakers on the music centre, picked up by the same microphone that was relaying the radio.
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Britguy
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The Examination by Britguy Part Three
Part Three – The performance
“Hello, I’m Dr Ingram.” Jason looked up to see a pleasant looking young man smiling down at him as he pulled on a pair of latex gloves. “I’m a registrar from the STD clinic at Queen Elizabeth Hospital in Birmingham and I do this on my day off for some extra cash. You can relax Mr Phillips, I may look young but I’ve got experience and you won’t have anything I haven’t seen a hundred times before. Put your hands behind your head out of the way please. Right, let’s have a look at you then shall we?”
Jason braced himself for the inevitability of the doctor looking under the sheet and swallowed hard.
“If you could, please” said the doctor, gesturing to the nurse. With no warning she pulled the sheet away, leaving him completely exposed to both their gazes. He lay there mortified, just waiting for this to be over. He reminded himself yet again that these were health workers whose only interest was professional. It didn’t help very much. He screwed his eyes shut as the doctor approached and took hold of his penis. It made it slightly less unbearable. He felt his foreskin being pulled back.
(In the next room seventeen women stared in delight at the young man lying a few feet away separated from them only by a pane of glass, nude from the waist down, blissfully unaware that he was showing everything he had to all his female colleagues.)
“Hmm.... Okaaay....” Jason heard the doctor say as he felt his penis being released. “there’s no sign of any disease or infection but I think we may have a case of penile dwarfism here. What do you think nurse?”
“Borderline. Hard to tell” she replied.
“I agree. Mr Phillips.... Mr Phillips, open your eyes and look at me for heaven’s sake! I’m not the bogeyman and I won’t go away if you can’t see me.”
Jason reluctantly opened his eyes. His gaze was drawn to his private parts, already being stared at by the doctor and the nurse (and nineteen others).
“Look in the mirror please” the doctor instructed. “I’m told this room was used by models when there was a clothing company here. Anyway the mirror is very useful; it allows you to see yourself as others see you. You’re not homosexual are you? I only ask because if not you probably don’t see a lot of naked men. I do, at work, and I have to say that that” – he poked Jason’s penis with a gloved finger – “looks well below average and these” – his testicles got the same treatment – “are none too impressive either.”
(This opinion was not shared by the women in the next room who were looking at a fairly average lad and wondered what was the point of the insults. They didn’t have to wait long to find out.)
“To get a proper measurement we need an erection. Leave your hands where they are and try to get excited just by thinking about something sexual for me please. I want to watch the process.”
(Mark was delighted and he now knew he’d picked the right person to play the doctor. He’d asked Tony Carter because he played football with him, knew he enjoyed a good laugh at someone else’s expense, and he worked for the empty unit’s letting agent so could get the keys. He hadn’t expected such a fantastic actor and Tony was inventing refinements to the torture that Mark had never thought of.)
Jason was acutely conscious that a male stranger who had just called his genitals “none too impressive” wanted to watch this happen. At least the dragon was female, if unattractive. He closed his eyes and thought about her watching him. Then he thought about how he’d feel if attractive girls like Susan and Kay were admiring him (horrified if it were real, of course, but he could fantasise) and his thoughts moved on to what he might like to do with an erection while in their company. It was a slow process, lasting two or three minutes altogether but he got there in the end.
(None of the watchers had ever seen this happen in such slow motion, allowing them to observe every stage at their leisure. The injunction to keep quiet was unnecessary; the women watched in fascinated silence. Even Susan had temporarily forgotten her objections. Patrick looked like he was watching a car crash, horrified but fascinated and unable to look away. Mark had his clenched fist stuck into his mouth to suppress his laughter.)
The nurse produced a ruler. She jammed one end into the base of Jason’s penis and flattened it against the ruler with her other hand. “Six point two inches” she called out.
“It seems I owe you an apology Mr Phillips” said the doctor. “That’s almost exactly average. Perhaps it’s a little chilly in here today. I’ll just take a sample for the count and then we’re all done.”
“Count? What count?” asked Jason.
“Well, the sperm count of course. It’s quite routine. Your friend Mr Lawson produced his sample very quickly; I don’t think he’s getting much at home.” (Outside Mark stopped laughing and his features tightened angrily.) “Do you have a girlfriend? No? So you masturbate. How often?”
“What?”
“How many times would you masturbate in an average week? And when was the last time exactly?”
“Maybe three or four times a week” admitted Jason miserably. “The last time was in the shower last night, about nine o’clock.”
“Okay so it’s a twenty hour sample. That’s fine. If you could just pop it into this sample dish” – he handed over a small glass dish – “we’re all finished.” After a few seconds of silence in which nobody moved he added “Liz and I can wait in my office while you do it if you prefer.”
“You’re damn right I prefer!” said Jason forcefully.
“As you wish, but it really makes no difference” replied the doctor, who looked as if he was suppressing a smile for some reason. “Come along Liz, Mr Phillips can call us when he’s finished.” They both left the room through the door they’d come in through.
“Hello, I’m Dr Ingram.” Jason looked up to see a pleasant looking young man smiling down at him as he pulled on a pair of latex gloves. “I’m a registrar from the STD clinic at Queen Elizabeth Hospital in Birmingham and I do this on my day off for some extra cash. You can relax Mr Phillips, I may look young but I’ve got experience and you won’t have anything I haven’t seen a hundred times before. Put your hands behind your head out of the way please. Right, let’s have a look at you then shall we?”
Jason braced himself for the inevitability of the doctor looking under the sheet and swallowed hard.
“If you could, please” said the doctor, gesturing to the nurse. With no warning she pulled the sheet away, leaving him completely exposed to both their gazes. He lay there mortified, just waiting for this to be over. He reminded himself yet again that these were health workers whose only interest was professional. It didn’t help very much. He screwed his eyes shut as the doctor approached and took hold of his penis. It made it slightly less unbearable. He felt his foreskin being pulled back.
(In the next room seventeen women stared in delight at the young man lying a few feet away separated from them only by a pane of glass, nude from the waist down, blissfully unaware that he was showing everything he had to all his female colleagues.)
“Hmm.... Okaaay....” Jason heard the doctor say as he felt his penis being released. “there’s no sign of any disease or infection but I think we may have a case of penile dwarfism here. What do you think nurse?”
“Borderline. Hard to tell” she replied.
“I agree. Mr Phillips.... Mr Phillips, open your eyes and look at me for heaven’s sake! I’m not the bogeyman and I won’t go away if you can’t see me.”
Jason reluctantly opened his eyes. His gaze was drawn to his private parts, already being stared at by the doctor and the nurse (and nineteen others).
“Look in the mirror please” the doctor instructed. “I’m told this room was used by models when there was a clothing company here. Anyway the mirror is very useful; it allows you to see yourself as others see you. You’re not homosexual are you? I only ask because if not you probably don’t see a lot of naked men. I do, at work, and I have to say that that” – he poked Jason’s penis with a gloved finger – “looks well below average and these” – his testicles got the same treatment – “are none too impressive either.”
(This opinion was not shared by the women in the next room who were looking at a fairly average lad and wondered what was the point of the insults. They didn’t have to wait long to find out.)
“To get a proper measurement we need an erection. Leave your hands where they are and try to get excited just by thinking about something sexual for me please. I want to watch the process.”
(Mark was delighted and he now knew he’d picked the right person to play the doctor. He’d asked Tony Carter because he played football with him, knew he enjoyed a good laugh at someone else’s expense, and he worked for the empty unit’s letting agent so could get the keys. He hadn’t expected such a fantastic actor and Tony was inventing refinements to the torture that Mark had never thought of.)
Jason was acutely conscious that a male stranger who had just called his genitals “none too impressive” wanted to watch this happen. At least the dragon was female, if unattractive. He closed his eyes and thought about her watching him. Then he thought about how he’d feel if attractive girls like Susan and Kay were admiring him (horrified if it were real, of course, but he could fantasise) and his thoughts moved on to what he might like to do with an erection while in their company. It was a slow process, lasting two or three minutes altogether but he got there in the end.
(None of the watchers had ever seen this happen in such slow motion, allowing them to observe every stage at their leisure. The injunction to keep quiet was unnecessary; the women watched in fascinated silence. Even Susan had temporarily forgotten her objections. Patrick looked like he was watching a car crash, horrified but fascinated and unable to look away. Mark had his clenched fist stuck into his mouth to suppress his laughter.)
The nurse produced a ruler. She jammed one end into the base of Jason’s penis and flattened it against the ruler with her other hand. “Six point two inches” she called out.
“It seems I owe you an apology Mr Phillips” said the doctor. “That’s almost exactly average. Perhaps it’s a little chilly in here today. I’ll just take a sample for the count and then we’re all done.”
“Count? What count?” asked Jason.
“Well, the sperm count of course. It’s quite routine. Your friend Mr Lawson produced his sample very quickly; I don’t think he’s getting much at home.” (Outside Mark stopped laughing and his features tightened angrily.) “Do you have a girlfriend? No? So you masturbate. How often?”
“What?”
“How many times would you masturbate in an average week? And when was the last time exactly?”
“Maybe three or four times a week” admitted Jason miserably. “The last time was in the shower last night, about nine o’clock.”
“Okay so it’s a twenty hour sample. That’s fine. If you could just pop it into this sample dish” – he handed over a small glass dish – “we’re all finished.” After a few seconds of silence in which nobody moved he added “Liz and I can wait in my office while you do it if you prefer.”
“You’re damn right I prefer!” said Jason forcefully.
“As you wish, but it really makes no difference” replied the doctor, who looked as if he was suppressing a smile for some reason. “Come along Liz, Mr Phillips can call us when he’s finished.” They both left the room through the door they’d come in through.
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Britguy
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The Examination by Britguy Part Four
Part Four – Climax
Tony (the ‘doctor’) and Liz emerged from the door from the ‘consulting room.’ Tony and Mark exchanged grins and thumbs up. The new arrivals joined the others standing around watching the window. Jason had got to work on producing his sample. Some of the time his eyes were shut, at others he was looking in a direction that made clear he enjoyed watching himself in the mirror, but his hand kept moving.
After a few minutes he stopped, got off the bed and stood up holding the dish in his left hand and his penis in his right. He held the dish close to the end of his penis and resumed pumping. Soon he ejected several spurts of ejaculate into the dish. After squeezing as much into the dish as possible he wiped himself with a tissue and called for Dr Ingram.
The ‘doctor’ and Liz went back into the ‘consulting room’ and Liz took the sample over to the desk.
“I know I said that was it, and really it is,” said the doctor, “but there’s just one thing so I can give you a completely clean bill of health with your company. I’m concerned that you look very thin. It’s probably within normal limits but I’d like to take your height and weight just to be sure. If you could just slip your shirt off so we can get a really accurate weight and step into my office I promise that really is the last thing I’ll ask you to do.”
After all he’d been through Jason wasn’t about to quibble about removing his shirt and he just wanted this over with no follow ups, ever. He pulled the shirt off and put it on the gurney. He looked at himself in the mirror. He thought he looked pretty good naked. It was a pity the nurse was an old trout and not a pretty girl.
The doctor opened the door and gestured for Jason to precede him through it. It turned out to open into a space about six feet by three with another door at the far end of it. “I imagine models like to protect their privacy too” commented the doctor as he switched the light on and closed the door.
Jason opened the second door and stepped through into the doctor’s office. Only it wasn’t the doctor’s office. He stood there stupidly in a state of shock for several seconds before his brain accepted what his eyes were telling it. Somehow he was standing stark bollock naked in a large empty room. Well, empty except for all his colleagues and what looked like most of the female staff of his firm. That was impossible, but also true.
He turned and grabbed the door handle, giving everyone a rear view for the first time. The door wouldn’t budge, too late he noticed the Yale lock. Clasping his hands in front of his crotch he turned to face the room. Everyone burst into song.
“Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Jason. Happy birthday to you.”
As the applause died down he saw Mark grinning at him. “What was it you said to me?” he asked. “Oh yes, I remember, ‘No way am I going to be the idiot standing there in front of women in his birthday suit while they sing happy birthday to him.’ That was it. Looks like you got that wrong doesn’t it?”
If Mark was hoping for a reaction he didn’t get one. Jason had by now got into the habit of enduring things for now with the intention to think about them later. He had enough sense to realise that losing his temper was probably exactly what Mark wanted. He just said “Yeah, looks that way. What did you do, bribe the doctor?”
“Tony’s not a doctor, he’s an estate agent” replied Mark. “Maggie and Liz are cleaners at his firm, well his dad’s firm actually. The clothes are from a fancy dress hire shop. Everything here is nicked, rented or borrowed. There never was any medical; I forged the letter, it’s easy if you know how. Mandy Rice-Davies was a famous prostitute twenty years ago; I don’t think she works here.”
“An estate agent!” Jason turned to Tony. “Why would you want to do that? You don’t even know me!”
Tony grinned, relishing the memory, anticipating the next revelation. “My mate asked me to” he said, pointing to Mark. “And also for fun. Just to see you lying there with no pants on, letting me stare at you and doing whatever I told you, getting a hard-on in front of me because I said so, that was awesome. And there’s another reason.” He looked at Mark. “Are you going to tell him or shall I?”
“I will” said Mark. “See this mirror?” He pointed to a large mirror fixed to the wall. It looked like the twin of the one in the phony consulting room. It looked like it needed cleaning. Suddenly he shouted “LIGHTS!” and the room went dark. There were a couple of flashes in the mirror and then it lit up. But the mirror was gone. Now it was a clear glass window into the next room.
“Two way mirror” crowed Mark triumphantly. He rapped on the glass.
Liz came into view behind the glass. “Hello, loser” her voice came from the music centre.
“Wired for sound” crowed Mark, really pleased with himself now. “We’ve all been here since before Tony first saw you. Since then we’ve watched everything that happened and heard everything said. All these girls have seen all you’ve got. They’ve seen it soft, seen it hard, seen it measured, heard how often you toss yourself off and watched you do it. All from about four feet away. This has been the best birthday wind-up ever!”
“You know I’m going to report this in the morning don’t you?” asked Jason in a cold flat voice, all emotion locked down with cast iron willpower.
“What are you going to report? A clerk supposedly gave you a letter you can’t produce? Two people who don’t work for the company asked you to do things off the company premises in your own time and you agreed to do them? Even if anyone believes you they won’t care and there’s no proof. Nobody from work has done anything except stand here watching you show off.”
Mark walked to the door Jason had come through and unlocked it. “Get dressed and go home” he said. “Take it like a man and don’t be so unsociable next time. You’ll only make things worse if you sulk.” He pushed Jason through the door and shut it.
It took Mark and Tony about an hour to demolish the wall they had jerry-built bisecting the vacant office using the mirror salvaged from the conversion of the old police station that Tony’s firm was project managing. They loaded the bits in a truck and went off for a drink.
On Friday morning Jason called in sick. Mark found that his colleagues blamed him for it and weren’t speaking to him. They’d been happy enough last night getting an eyeful, he reflected sourly.
George Carter got back to his office mid-morning Friday in a filthy temper. He’d had to go and check one of the firm’s vacant properties. He’d had an extraordinary phone call alleging that someone had installed a two way mirror in there and was using it to spy on young men somehow and that his son was somehow involved. He’d had to check, of course, but naturally there was no mirror. Tony wasn’t like that anyway, he had a lovely girlfriend. If that young man called back with any more of his sick fantasies he’d get the rough side of George’s tongue and no mistake. No wonder he hadn’t wanted to give his name.
The End
Tony (the ‘doctor’) and Liz emerged from the door from the ‘consulting room.’ Tony and Mark exchanged grins and thumbs up. The new arrivals joined the others standing around watching the window. Jason had got to work on producing his sample. Some of the time his eyes were shut, at others he was looking in a direction that made clear he enjoyed watching himself in the mirror, but his hand kept moving.
After a few minutes he stopped, got off the bed and stood up holding the dish in his left hand and his penis in his right. He held the dish close to the end of his penis and resumed pumping. Soon he ejected several spurts of ejaculate into the dish. After squeezing as much into the dish as possible he wiped himself with a tissue and called for Dr Ingram.
The ‘doctor’ and Liz went back into the ‘consulting room’ and Liz took the sample over to the desk.
“I know I said that was it, and really it is,” said the doctor, “but there’s just one thing so I can give you a completely clean bill of health with your company. I’m concerned that you look very thin. It’s probably within normal limits but I’d like to take your height and weight just to be sure. If you could just slip your shirt off so we can get a really accurate weight and step into my office I promise that really is the last thing I’ll ask you to do.”
After all he’d been through Jason wasn’t about to quibble about removing his shirt and he just wanted this over with no follow ups, ever. He pulled the shirt off and put it on the gurney. He looked at himself in the mirror. He thought he looked pretty good naked. It was a pity the nurse was an old trout and not a pretty girl.
The doctor opened the door and gestured for Jason to precede him through it. It turned out to open into a space about six feet by three with another door at the far end of it. “I imagine models like to protect their privacy too” commented the doctor as he switched the light on and closed the door.
Jason opened the second door and stepped through into the doctor’s office. Only it wasn’t the doctor’s office. He stood there stupidly in a state of shock for several seconds before his brain accepted what his eyes were telling it. Somehow he was standing stark bollock naked in a large empty room. Well, empty except for all his colleagues and what looked like most of the female staff of his firm. That was impossible, but also true.
He turned and grabbed the door handle, giving everyone a rear view for the first time. The door wouldn’t budge, too late he noticed the Yale lock. Clasping his hands in front of his crotch he turned to face the room. Everyone burst into song.
“Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Jason. Happy birthday to you.”
As the applause died down he saw Mark grinning at him. “What was it you said to me?” he asked. “Oh yes, I remember, ‘No way am I going to be the idiot standing there in front of women in his birthday suit while they sing happy birthday to him.’ That was it. Looks like you got that wrong doesn’t it?”
If Mark was hoping for a reaction he didn’t get one. Jason had by now got into the habit of enduring things for now with the intention to think about them later. He had enough sense to realise that losing his temper was probably exactly what Mark wanted. He just said “Yeah, looks that way. What did you do, bribe the doctor?”
“Tony’s not a doctor, he’s an estate agent” replied Mark. “Maggie and Liz are cleaners at his firm, well his dad’s firm actually. The clothes are from a fancy dress hire shop. Everything here is nicked, rented or borrowed. There never was any medical; I forged the letter, it’s easy if you know how. Mandy Rice-Davies was a famous prostitute twenty years ago; I don’t think she works here.”
“An estate agent!” Jason turned to Tony. “Why would you want to do that? You don’t even know me!”
Tony grinned, relishing the memory, anticipating the next revelation. “My mate asked me to” he said, pointing to Mark. “And also for fun. Just to see you lying there with no pants on, letting me stare at you and doing whatever I told you, getting a hard-on in front of me because I said so, that was awesome. And there’s another reason.” He looked at Mark. “Are you going to tell him or shall I?”
“I will” said Mark. “See this mirror?” He pointed to a large mirror fixed to the wall. It looked like the twin of the one in the phony consulting room. It looked like it needed cleaning. Suddenly he shouted “LIGHTS!” and the room went dark. There were a couple of flashes in the mirror and then it lit up. But the mirror was gone. Now it was a clear glass window into the next room.
“Two way mirror” crowed Mark triumphantly. He rapped on the glass.
Liz came into view behind the glass. “Hello, loser” her voice came from the music centre.
“Wired for sound” crowed Mark, really pleased with himself now. “We’ve all been here since before Tony first saw you. Since then we’ve watched everything that happened and heard everything said. All these girls have seen all you’ve got. They’ve seen it soft, seen it hard, seen it measured, heard how often you toss yourself off and watched you do it. All from about four feet away. This has been the best birthday wind-up ever!”
“You know I’m going to report this in the morning don’t you?” asked Jason in a cold flat voice, all emotion locked down with cast iron willpower.
“What are you going to report? A clerk supposedly gave you a letter you can’t produce? Two people who don’t work for the company asked you to do things off the company premises in your own time and you agreed to do them? Even if anyone believes you they won’t care and there’s no proof. Nobody from work has done anything except stand here watching you show off.”
Mark walked to the door Jason had come through and unlocked it. “Get dressed and go home” he said. “Take it like a man and don’t be so unsociable next time. You’ll only make things worse if you sulk.” He pushed Jason through the door and shut it.
It took Mark and Tony about an hour to demolish the wall they had jerry-built bisecting the vacant office using the mirror salvaged from the conversion of the old police station that Tony’s firm was project managing. They loaded the bits in a truck and went off for a drink.
On Friday morning Jason called in sick. Mark found that his colleagues blamed him for it and weren’t speaking to him. They’d been happy enough last night getting an eyeful, he reflected sourly.
George Carter got back to his office mid-morning Friday in a filthy temper. He’d had to go and check one of the firm’s vacant properties. He’d had an extraordinary phone call alleging that someone had installed a two way mirror in there and was using it to spy on young men somehow and that his son was somehow involved. He’d had to check, of course, but naturally there was no mirror. Tony wasn’t like that anyway, he had a lovely girlfriend. If that young man called back with any more of his sick fantasies he’d get the rough side of George’s tongue and no mistake. No wonder he hadn’t wanted to give his name.
The End
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