something more
A Jarring Punishment (Chapter 7 - March 17)
Re: A Jarring Punishment
Oh, this is not the ending. This is just the beginning. 
something more
to anticipate next month
something more
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EverythingOff
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Re: A Jarring Punishment
I'm not a big reader of ENF, but this story sure is fun. Nice to see a little payback. Well done and well written.
- Lisa_The_Brave_12
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Re: A Jarring Punishment
An excellent continuation to an excellent story so far.
I love the payback and I bet the girls will regret all their actions tenfold!
I love the payback and I bet the girls will regret all their actions tenfold!
- superevil7
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Re: A Jarring Punishment
Thanks, and thanks for checking it outEverythingOff wrote: Wed Oct 29, 2025 12:15 am I'm not a big reader of ENF, but this story sure is fun. Nice to see a little payback. Well done and well written.
Oh, they willLisa_The_Brave_12 wrote: Sun Nov 02, 2025 8:44 pm An excellent continuation to an excellent story so far.
I love the payback and I bet the girls will regret all their actions tenfold!![]()
- EddieDavidson
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Re: A Jarring Punishment
*deleted*
Last edited by EddieDavidson on Wed Nov 05, 2025 4:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.
All of my stories: https://storiesonline.net/a/eddie-davidson
The site is free up to 100 chapters a day. You can get unlimited just for submitting stories.
The site is free up to 100 chapters a day. You can get unlimited just for submitting stories.
- superevil7
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Re: A Jarring Punishment
Of course, thanks! That was a lot of fun. I do already have the next few chapters ready to go, and the whole story planned out, and it goes in a bit of a different direction form this. Or, at least, is a lot more prolonged, and structured differently.EddieDavidson wrote: Mon Nov 03, 2025 1:07 pm Am I allowed to contribute?
If not, ignore - I'd love to see this continue
I also just wanted to point out that Billy isn't related to Mary Beth. He and his little sister Katie are staying over at her house while their parents are on vacation. Maybe I messed up at some point in the story or didn't make that clear enough?
But thanks again! That was definitely a fun read, and maybe I'll try to incorporate that into a future chapter.
- EddieDavidson
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Re: A Jarring Punishment
fantastic.
Last edited by EddieDavidson on Tue Nov 11, 2025 12:50 am, edited 1 time in total.
All of my stories: https://storiesonline.net/a/eddie-davidson
The site is free up to 100 chapters a day. You can get unlimited just for submitting stories.
The site is free up to 100 chapters a day. You can get unlimited just for submitting stories.
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Freesub
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Re: A Jarring Punishment
I appreciate he took the time out to write his own contribution, but please don't include thumbs in the butt and stuff - it would completely ruin the entire vibe of the story so far.superevil7 wrote: Mon Nov 03, 2025 1:27 pmOf course, thanks! That was a lot of fun. I do already have the next few chapters ready to go, and the whole story planned out, and it goes in a bit of a different direction form this. Or, at least, is a lot more prolonged, and structured differently.EddieDavidson wrote: Mon Nov 03, 2025 1:07 pm Am I allowed to contribute?
If not, ignore - I'd love to see this continue
I also just wanted to point out that Billy isn't related to Mary Beth. He and his little sister Katie are staying over at her house while their parents are on vacation. Maybe I messed up at some point in the story or didn't make that clear enough?
But thanks again! That was definitely a fun read, and maybe I'll try to incorporate that into a future chapter.
My real incidents:
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viewtopic.php?t=4002
viewtopic.php?t=3737
viewtopic.php?t=3840
viewtopic.php?t=3843
viewtopic.php?t=4002
- superevil7
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Re: A Jarring Punishment
EddieDavidson wrote: Tue Nov 04, 2025 2:15 am I didn't really think about the FNA until I saw it mentioned and realized just how many of my beloved favorite stories you've written. Your mind is filthy, your writing is clean.
It's word pictures all the way through. The tempo and pace of your story is slower in a way that builds anticipation. I don't have that mastered yet. I may never have it mastered.
Thank you, so, so much! That's really very kind of you to say.If you wrote talking trees into this story it would seem like gibberish. That's because the internal logic works in the story and when you craft "Hey, in this county the law is you have to be nude" or "Hey, we have a punishment jar" and "Hey, I have a watch that makes shit happen" - you do it in such a way that makes me want to believe it because you place these authentic characters in that that are universally easy to believe. The dialogue you've written in this story for instance - it's Hooked6 level.
For me, dialogue is usually what comes easiest to me. I usually think of that first, then what the characters would be feeling about the situation, and then finally any actions they might make last. I think it's because I don't have a very good mind's eye. It's hard for me to picture images in my head, and even when I concentrate, they are usually pretty hazy.
It's probably best not to try and piggyback off Hooked6's hard work for something like that. If we were to do a collab, original characters would probably be better.EddieDavidson wrote: Tue Nov 04, 2025 2:15 am Let's do one together then, if you like? Can we try taking turns on a a Hooked6 classic and continuing it as an experiment? Your writing is exquisite.
Butt stuff has never really been my thing. Maybe some exposure or a little touch, but only to highten the embarrassment. That won't be a part of this story, I promise you.Freesub wrote: Tue Nov 04, 2025 8:20 am I appreciate he took the time out to write his own contribution, but please don't include thumbs in the butt and stuff - it would completely ruin the entire vibe of the story so far.
Last edited by superevil7 on Wed Nov 05, 2025 12:51 pm, edited 1 time in total.
- EddieDavidson
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Re: A Jarring Punishment
there are three holes on a lady and if the whole idea is you can explore and learn about them, that's definitely one that I would be checking out.
when I was a kid, and this is a true story I had two cousins named Sherry and Carrie. I had another cousin named Little Alan who was their little brother and I think they factor heavily into many of my stories.
they used to have all these weird rituals like if you fart, you have to run to the door and grab the door handle before someone can punch you in the arm. if they punch you in the arm, then I guess they win or something. I don't know. but they could punch you until you got to the door.
if they burped while they were drinking Kool-Aid, they had to put a Big l over their head with their fingers. I remember them with their Debby Boone short haircuts and how they looked basically the same, just one year apart.. they shared a room and then their little brother got his own private room.
.
many of my girls without modesty stories are shaped by their mother who definitely would take us to the beach and make them strip down at the beach and shower before they would get into the car.
they had tits but they were super small and Crystal would actually say to them things like " when you get an actual set of boobies, you can act like people care but those mosquito bites are not worth covering up."
she wasn't cruel, but she lies not concerned about their modesty just like the stories.
I remember one day I saw Carrie's butthole and I was fascinated because it was a completely different color than the rest of her skin and I thought that was poop.
" it's just a butthole and I clean it obviously."
," no you don't. you could stripe your panties more than your little brother."
I would say that's probably the moment that I became a fan of embarrassed nude female stories. granted, like you I thought butts were gross and disgusting but the fact that she was ashamed of that part of her body, the vulnerable look on her face knowing that I could see where she pooped from and thought that she had food because she had dark skin around the anus, made her cringe in a good way and I remember looking at their clits and thinking they were penises. I said something along the lines of are you boys. her mom at a pretty good laugh about that as well and said that some boys don't have as big of a penis as her daughters. The daughters were actually proud of that.
so making fun of the body, it was kind of a natural way of exploring and learning about it. it wasn't sexual but it was teasing and when I think back on it, I definitely had a much better education than a lot of people because my aunt was kind of like the mom's in the story of " it's just a butthole. everybody's got one. take a good long look and get it out of your system and then you won't want to look at it anymore."
she would bathe with them together and her reasoning was that she did not want to waste bath water running it for the three of them so they would all get in there and she would get in their wisdom. she would say things like get your thumb out of your butt and they would giggle. to me that's the authentic part about some of these stories is that butts are funny and girls and boys are curious
when we would play troost or dare, we would almost always do dare.
what I learned was that Carrie was a natural submissive. she was the younger sister. I didn't know what the word submissive was at the time but in retrospect I realize now that she would do anything you told her.
I don't think there was anything she would not have done. she was pretty well fearless. whether it was put a stinky sock in your mouth or stand at the dinner table with your thumb up your butthole and eat with one hand.
I realized that from a story perspective you may be thinking that there's proof all over your thumb or that it smells but it really didn't. we giggled and she wasn't even naked. she pulled her shorts down and did it on a dare when we were all alone eating bologna sandwiches was way too much mayonnaise.
they were the ones who told me that it looked like come. at the time I didn't know what come was.
, I will never forget what little Allen said to them.
" I came all over your bologna sandwich while you were in the bathroom.'
Sherry looked at him skeptically and took a bite out of it and said I don't care. I'm hungry.
she did it very plainly without any fear or malice but not like somebody who was a cum hungry vixen. who was more like she simply didn't believe him and wasn't going to give him the satisfaction
in retrospect, I didn't know that cum came out of a dick at that point in my life and I had never masturbated to completion. so I didn't get the joke until much later in life but now when I write stories, it's often with this idea that they're sitting around their house on a hot summer day and it's boring as shit because they only have two channels on TV and dirty little minds, so they're behinds and their nubby little titties are fair game for truths to her dare without any truths.
I remember them saying something along the lines of we've already asked all the questions that we can think of, so we just basically played Dare
they never dared to kiss or do anything sexual. it was usually kind of like flashing by running around the outside of the house in just panties
One of the other hallmarks of my stories is usually that the mom does not buy training bras because Crystal did not believe in them. she said that the girls would grow boobs by the time that she bought them and she wasn't going to waste her money on special tank tops and that the girls could just wear tank tops
anyway, the whole reason I say that is because even though thumbs in the butt is a limit to you, to me it's like a goal. pretty much all of my dares back then were fingers in the nose or thumbs in the butt
I was fascinated and I did not sexualize the butthole the way I did the pussy so it was much easier to do those things with my cousins. thank you for coming to my TED talk
and by the way, I mean every word that I say about your writing. you are truly brilliant. I would really like it though if you do have a scene here where there is a guy who's fascinated with pulling apart butt cheeks. you can call that guy Eddie if you want to
I will look for a story but I can't promise that there won't be any butts in it and if you want to join in, please feel free. I may go back and write a version of the little island and Carrie and Sherry story but if I did, I would probably make things a lot more interesting.
I wrote one that was inspired by them a long time ago, but it was more of an enm version. she caught me playing doctor one time and she painted my dick with lipstick and made me sit outside on a folding chair while they ate dinner but she didn't punish the girls. she also let them dress me up a few times in girl stuff but not as a punishment. she was like ," what else do you have better to do today?" and basically just kind of volun told me.
she was fairly equal opportunity though as far as not having modesty goes. she was very quirky. she was way ahead of her time as far as not smoking in her house. back then, everybody smoked in everybody's house and my parents wouldn't even go there. My dad was super offended that she wouldn't let him smoke near her.
she used to also make the kids learn to inject her her insulin. which at the time creeped me out but now as I am older I understand why she was doing that.
so I would say that my aunt probably factors in pretty heavily to many of the attitudes in my stories.
when I was a kid, and this is a true story I had two cousins named Sherry and Carrie. I had another cousin named Little Alan who was their little brother and I think they factor heavily into many of my stories.
they used to have all these weird rituals like if you fart, you have to run to the door and grab the door handle before someone can punch you in the arm. if they punch you in the arm, then I guess they win or something. I don't know. but they could punch you until you got to the door.
if they burped while they were drinking Kool-Aid, they had to put a Big l over their head with their fingers. I remember them with their Debby Boone short haircuts and how they looked basically the same, just one year apart.. they shared a room and then their little brother got his own private room.
.
many of my girls without modesty stories are shaped by their mother who definitely would take us to the beach and make them strip down at the beach and shower before they would get into the car.
they had tits but they were super small and Crystal would actually say to them things like " when you get an actual set of boobies, you can act like people care but those mosquito bites are not worth covering up."
she wasn't cruel, but she lies not concerned about their modesty just like the stories.
I remember one day I saw Carrie's butthole and I was fascinated because it was a completely different color than the rest of her skin and I thought that was poop.
" it's just a butthole and I clean it obviously."
," no you don't. you could stripe your panties more than your little brother."
I would say that's probably the moment that I became a fan of embarrassed nude female stories. granted, like you I thought butts were gross and disgusting but the fact that she was ashamed of that part of her body, the vulnerable look on her face knowing that I could see where she pooped from and thought that she had food because she had dark skin around the anus, made her cringe in a good way and I remember looking at their clits and thinking they were penises. I said something along the lines of are you boys. her mom at a pretty good laugh about that as well and said that some boys don't have as big of a penis as her daughters. The daughters were actually proud of that.
so making fun of the body, it was kind of a natural way of exploring and learning about it. it wasn't sexual but it was teasing and when I think back on it, I definitely had a much better education than a lot of people because my aunt was kind of like the mom's in the story of " it's just a butthole. everybody's got one. take a good long look and get it out of your system and then you won't want to look at it anymore."
she would bathe with them together and her reasoning was that she did not want to waste bath water running it for the three of them so they would all get in there and she would get in their wisdom. she would say things like get your thumb out of your butt and they would giggle. to me that's the authentic part about some of these stories is that butts are funny and girls and boys are curious
when we would play troost or dare, we would almost always do dare.
what I learned was that Carrie was a natural submissive. she was the younger sister. I didn't know what the word submissive was at the time but in retrospect I realize now that she would do anything you told her.
I don't think there was anything she would not have done. she was pretty well fearless. whether it was put a stinky sock in your mouth or stand at the dinner table with your thumb up your butthole and eat with one hand.
I realized that from a story perspective you may be thinking that there's proof all over your thumb or that it smells but it really didn't. we giggled and she wasn't even naked. she pulled her shorts down and did it on a dare when we were all alone eating bologna sandwiches was way too much mayonnaise.
they were the ones who told me that it looked like come. at the time I didn't know what come was.
, I will never forget what little Allen said to them.
" I came all over your bologna sandwich while you were in the bathroom.'
Sherry looked at him skeptically and took a bite out of it and said I don't care. I'm hungry.
she did it very plainly without any fear or malice but not like somebody who was a cum hungry vixen. who was more like she simply didn't believe him and wasn't going to give him the satisfaction
in retrospect, I didn't know that cum came out of a dick at that point in my life and I had never masturbated to completion. so I didn't get the joke until much later in life but now when I write stories, it's often with this idea that they're sitting around their house on a hot summer day and it's boring as shit because they only have two channels on TV and dirty little minds, so they're behinds and their nubby little titties are fair game for truths to her dare without any truths.
I remember them saying something along the lines of we've already asked all the questions that we can think of, so we just basically played Dare
they never dared to kiss or do anything sexual. it was usually kind of like flashing by running around the outside of the house in just panties
One of the other hallmarks of my stories is usually that the mom does not buy training bras because Crystal did not believe in them. she said that the girls would grow boobs by the time that she bought them and she wasn't going to waste her money on special tank tops and that the girls could just wear tank tops
anyway, the whole reason I say that is because even though thumbs in the butt is a limit to you, to me it's like a goal. pretty much all of my dares back then were fingers in the nose or thumbs in the butt
I was fascinated and I did not sexualize the butthole the way I did the pussy so it was much easier to do those things with my cousins. thank you for coming to my TED talk
and by the way, I mean every word that I say about your writing. you are truly brilliant. I would really like it though if you do have a scene here where there is a guy who's fascinated with pulling apart butt cheeks. you can call that guy Eddie if you want to
I will look for a story but I can't promise that there won't be any butts in it and if you want to join in, please feel free. I may go back and write a version of the little island and Carrie and Sherry story but if I did, I would probably make things a lot more interesting.
I wrote one that was inspired by them a long time ago, but it was more of an enm version. she caught me playing doctor one time and she painted my dick with lipstick and made me sit outside on a folding chair while they ate dinner but she didn't punish the girls. she also let them dress me up a few times in girl stuff but not as a punishment. she was like ," what else do you have better to do today?" and basically just kind of volun told me.
she was fairly equal opportunity though as far as not having modesty goes. she was very quirky. she was way ahead of her time as far as not smoking in her house. back then, everybody smoked in everybody's house and my parents wouldn't even go there. My dad was super offended that she wouldn't let him smoke near her.
she used to also make the kids learn to inject her her insulin. which at the time creeped me out but now as I am older I understand why she was doing that.
so I would say that my aunt probably factors in pretty heavily to many of the attitudes in my stories.
All of my stories: https://storiesonline.net/a/eddie-davidson
The site is free up to 100 chapters a day. You can get unlimited just for submitting stories.
The site is free up to 100 chapters a day. You can get unlimited just for submitting stories.
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